The Lent Retreat on March 26 with the Rev. Patty Soukup was a time of sharing, insight, and enrichment for the over two dozen participants. Everyone left the day with new ideas of how to be wise matriarchs who share their wisdom pouring from new wineskins.
Slides from the event can be downloaded, and you can watch the presentation (without the discussion) below.
Patty offered suggestions for important paperwork to complete so our families can be better prepared. The heart of the presentation was based on Richard Rohr's book Falling Upward. Patty introduced the "Loyal Soldier" and said that to grow into the "Third-third" of life and become a true wise matriarch, we have to dismiss this part of ourselves. The Loyal Soldier served us well as guide and authority, but can in fact keep us from "being able to hear the real voice of God." In the Third-third, according to Rohr, our faith journey begins where we have a "strong self that can positively obey Jesus." The later years of life are a time to identify the contents of the new wine in the strong wineskins prepared by the work of the loyal soldier.
Discussion was lively. Participants shared that self-compassion is needed as we dismiss the loyal soldier part of ourselves. Some suggested the idea of a ritual or ceremony where those entering retirement or other transitional later-life changes could celebrate and dismiss the younger self. (Perhaps something women's ministry will consider.) We try to be perfect in early years, although as someone noted, Victor Hugo said "the perfect is the enemy of the good." Deitrich Bonhoeffer was quoted as saying "grace is free but allowing God's grace is hard."
Patty then encouraged us to recognize and share our gifts because "elders influence other people simply by being who they are. It is especially important to share our gifts and insights with younger women (and men). They are eager to share their knowledge of technology. We can be equally eager to share our faith and gifts.
In the discussion participants identified some ways to do this: By listening, just being 'present', sharing experiences, having gratitude, being a joyful example of faith. Other things include modeling faith by our lives and sharing by working with youth and children's programs and even helping create inclusive programs. (The Autism program at Holy Family was referenced.) It was noted that Mother Teresa said we can all do 'small things with great love' in order to make a difference. Just being ourselves can make an impact.
Our next event will be May 7: Celebrating Caregivers which will be a Zoom party. You are encouraged to invite caregivers you know to join small groups at churches and homes for this. Watch for more info in April.